Maintaining a healthy and happy relationship requires being completely present, open communication, compromise and unyielding trust. Although these traits may be obvious to most of us, what you may not have considered is that self-reflection, or looking within to assess and evaluate your contribution to the partnership, is also necessary.
In fact, understanding your own actions and acknowledging the effect they may have on your partner is probably one of the most crucial actions we can take to keep our relationship thriving. After all, we can only control our own behavior, not that of others. The following list will help you to understand the common issues that lead to problems among significant others and are often ways to kill the romance.
When you are feeling insecure regarding your partner’s feelings or commitment to you, it’s easy to engage in controlling behavior. Complaining about the time they spend away from home with their friends or trying to micromanage their every move will almost always do more harm than good. Controlling behavior leads to feelings of resentment, which can then prompt your partner to act on those feelings in a negative way such as cheating behaviors or starting to pull away from you emotionally and physically. Instead, try to identify the source of your feelings. Then sit down for an honest talk about them. It’s likely your significant other can provide the reassurance you crave when they know about the feelings you’re dealing with.
Being Too Dependent
Being too dependent on your partner is a definite romance killer. While many people do enjoy feeling needed by their partner, most also find independence and confidence very attractive. Being too dependent on your partner often plays out in ways such as not developing and engaging in your own interests, expecting your partner to make the majority of the decisions that impact the two of you or not expressing your own views and ideas. It’s exhausting to have to think for a partner or involve them in every activity we engage in. Try to remember the things you enjoyed doing when you were single, and work to cultivate those interests once again.
Running From Conflict
No one likes confrontation. Talking about negative emotions can be a scary proposition. It’s normal to worry about rejection or the possibility that you may anger your partner when you bring up an issue. However, sticking our head in the sand or avoiding discussing the important issues or problems is simply postponing the inevitable. By refusing to express your feelings, you risk unnecessary hurt and resentment. Trust in your partner and talk to them about your concerns in ways that place the emphasis on you and doesn’t point fingers in blame.
Not Being Supportive
We all get busy and overwhelmed in our daily lives. In these times, especially, it’s easy to fall into a pattern of neglecting your partner or taking them for granted. Feeling supported or cherished is essential to a lasting romance. Without these types of positive expressions, maintaining a relationship begins to feel like more effort than it’s worth. Taking time to provide words of encouragement and appreciation will increase your bond and increase happiness in your relationship.
These are just a few of the behaviors people engage in that have a negative impact on their relationships. Make a concerted effort to avoid these romance killers to ensure your relationship is one that thrives and lasts.
What are some of the ways you’ve found to keep the romance alive? Share and inspire us below!